Turn & Face the Strange Changes

Inspired by David Bowie’s song “Changes” this post is all about the realizations and strange changes I realized will be happening soon in my life.  I guess it was also brought about because of my upcoming birthday.

In a little less than three months I’ll be turning 25. I know a lot of people will say, “Oh, you are still so young”. Well, to me I feel like I’m younger. I’m not sure why I feel that way but that’s how I feel. I can’t believe that I’ve some how gone through 3 years of community college, 3 years of university, and almost an entire year of my first year of teaching.

Seven years since I’ve been in high school and I’m thinking where has the time gone. I know I’ve done a lot of things since high school but it still doesn’t feel like it’s been that long. Then with all the ch-ch-ch-changes happening in my life I feel like I’m slightly having a quarter life crisis.

I think it has come about because of having to become a minimalist due to decisions that I have decided to make to reach goals I have. Going through all of my things and finding different trinkets from high school made me reminisce. Then adding my upcoming birthday into the mix made me think lots of random thoughts.

My first random thought was how after this summer I’m not going to have another birthday in the states with my family and/or friends until I’m 28. That’s right people! I’ll be spending my 26th and 27th birthday in Macedonia thousands of miles from the people I’ve spent almost every birthday with. It isn’t a big deal but I think that’s what finally got me to thinking how different the next 2 years of my life are going to be.The only other random thought that’s worth mentioning would be how most of my relationships that I have now will probably falter in the upcoming two years.

Living in another country doesn’t really help foster or keep relationships especially when it is for such a long time. I mean sure I’ll still have a great relationship with my mom and I don’t have a relationship with my dad now anyways so those won’t change. What about my grandparents though? With both in a nursing home who knows if they will make it through the two years I will be gone. Then there’s the already rocky relationship I’m in that to be honest is going to be a stretch to make it through two years being separated. I guess the only other relationship I’m worried about is the one between my best friend that I hardly see now anyways. But, he is moving out west anyways so its not like we would have been hanging out a lot if I stayed.

I guess I just have a lot of thoughts running through my head about this upcoming birthday and everything else. I mean What will I come home too? Will my puppy remember me? How will it feel to have been gone for so long and then just drop back into my old life? I guess I’ll just have to turn and face the (strange) ch-ch-ch-changes.

Have you ever realized all of sudden you’re way older then you thought you should be? Or have you ever been gone for an extended period of time and realized how different everything was when you got back?


5 thoughts on “Turn & Face the Strange Changes

  1. I’m a young sixty. I suppose I feel younger in chronological age, but there are signs that I am in fact sixty. However, I can still remember pieces of my twenties. I was having so much fun just living life that it never occurred to me to analyze this time in my life. In my opinion, you sound a little bewildered; maybe a tab bit disappointed. So, I’m going to ask you a question…

    What would put the icing on your cake right now? It appears you need something sweeten the pot as it were. Since we control our lives, you have an opportunity. If things aren’t like you think they should be, by all means, CHANGE something!!!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I guess I’m just bewildered that all that time has passed by so quickly. I am actually getting ready to leave in September for Macedonia with the Peace Corps which, is what I have wanted to do for over 10 years. I guess I feel like there just isn’t going to be enough time in my life to do everything that I want to do and it’s a little crazy that I’m already going to be 25 and I still feel like I just got out of high school.
      Going on the road trip that I’ve had planned for ages would put the icing on my cake right now. I was supposed to go on spring break (I’m a teacher) but, I didn’t get the money I was supposed to for coaching so it didn’t happen. Now I’ll have to wait until the summer to go on it. That is if I even do it because I could save that money to travel in Europe.
      It’s just an overwhelming time of the year with resigning from my position, finishing the school year, figuring out storage options, and completing tasks for the Peace Corps. I’m just ready for some down time to contemplate everything that’s happened in the past couple of years.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. I believe you’ll have plenty of time. People are living into the hundreds.

        But…take a day or two, an hour or two…just for yourself. YOU DESERVE IT. Find yourself a “tree house” of sorts.

        Highest and Best!

        Liked by 1 person

  2. I think everyone goes through the mind bending thoughts of “how did I get here’ and “how did I get this old”……I still wonder (at age 61) how did I get here? I still (in my head) feel 32…….I don’t know why 32 sticks with me, it wasn’t that fabulous of a time, but in my head there it is….32. Changes can be scary, terrific, exciting, awful……….every emotion possible at one time or another. The deal is to just get through it because the emotions are fleeting. yes, you can remain close to people when you are physically far away from them. it’s easier now than it was when I was a young woman. We had once a month (or every six months) phone calls and letters. Now there is email, skype, all sorts of electronic ways to stay in touch. The key to it all is…..STAY IN TOUCH. yep, that’s it. Don’t be the one to “forget” to call, email, write……….and your puppy? he will not forget you. Look at you tube to be comforted there…just look at soldiers coming home again after three or four years and their dogs reactions. You’ll be okay.

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    1. For someone reason the age that sticks with me is 14 and I have no idea why. Maybe as I get older that will change.
      I’m getting through all of the emotions I have been feeling by writing about them. It takes awhile for things to really hit me that they are happening and without writing about them I can’t process them.
      I know it is easy to keep in touch with people now I guess I just have misgivings about a relationship that is already rocky making it through something like that. The relationship is actually with someone who has been deployed before through the army. So, I mean he’s been through it before but he was on the opposite side.
      As for my friends the ones that want to stay in touch while I’m gone have already been talking to me about different apps we can use.
      I guess it’s hard to go through any super big changes without some doubts and I express my doubts on here. I guess I need to write a post about how excited I am and how I can’t wait for the next chapter in my life. That’s what I meant by the title. I’m going to turn and face the changes, even if their strange, in my life with a good attitude even if I have misgivings about some parts of the changes.

      Liked by 1 person

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